How Infidelity Affects a Relationship and Children
Trust and loyalty are two important foundations for a relationship. Married couples vow to share love, understanding, and commitment with the intent it will last a lifetime. However, infidelity can potentially destroy the foundation upon which you built your relationship. When a relationship is in trouble, counselling can help even before someone resorts to cheating, or help restore a broken partnership.
Why People Cheat
While men are statistically more likely to cheat in a relationship, a 2011 infographic on U.S. adultery showed women are increasingly willing and able to risk their marriage. Most of us are aware an extramarital affair can adversely affect relationships. Why do some people still cheat? Here are a few reasons:
- Lack of sexual satisfaction
- Lack of emotional support
- Boredom
- “Outgrew each other”
- Lost excitement/spark
- Fell out of love
- Curiosity/wanting new experience
- Lack of communication
- Unresolved problems
- Excessive conflict
- Need for additional validation
Negative Effects
In marriage, monogamy is often promised to assure lifetime commitment and prevent the risk of sexually transmitted diseases. When infidelity occurs, a person may pay more attention to the freshness and physical excitement of an affair and be blind to the consequences for their relationships with both spouse and children.
Despite the initial excitement, infidelity can harm the happiness and stability of your family and children:
- Distrust
Infidelity breeds distrust. Both your partner and children can feel betrayed upon discovering your secret, which may result in their experiencing emotional trauma.
- Grief
A cheated partner may experience symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), including depression, anxiety, feelings of insignificance, frustration, sleeplessness, loss of appetite, and anger. All these may continue to manifest themselves even when the cheating has ended.
- Sense of Rejection
Often, a parent who is involved in an affair invests less emotional time and energy in his/her family, especially with children. As a result, children may experience feelings of rejection.
- Low Self-Esteem
Girls whose parents had an extramarital affair are at more risk for low self-esteem. They may end up thinking that all partners cheat, which can result in a loss of confidence and trust issues.
While some marriages survive infidelity, it takes some time to heal the hurt. Recovering from infidelity can be slow and challenging, but completely worthwhile for the sake of a family and future happiness. If you are looking for professional counselling for cheating, please call Wendy Limarzi’s Depression & Relationship Counselling Services at (519) 253-1519. Our team of qualified therapists will guide you and your family through the healing process.